As promised, here’s a Conversational Covenant for in-person conversations.
Like a virtual conversation, an in-person conversation has one or two facilitators. Participants speak directly to the facilitator(s) so that the atmosphere stays calm.
When we are in person, we ask people to remain seated so that all are on the same level. Sometimes standing up to make remarks can be a power move. Of course, if someone needs to stretch a leg or a back or a hip, standing quietly for a few moments is okay.
We sit in a circle. We pass a talking object around the circle. When you have the talking object, you may talk. When you do not have the talking object, you listen. You may always pass when the talking object comes to you. Before the talking object goes around a second time, we check to see if any one who passed the first time would like to speak.
You can use a covenant in any setting with any group of people. Your family could try a covenant for talking about hard things. Maybe your group of friends needs a little help getting through an unresolved conflict. You might like to try using a talking object during a church committee/council/team meeting. The possibilities are endless!
This Covenant is for creating safer, sacred space for all participants. Your presence indicates your agreement to abide by the following Conversational Covenant:
- We will respect the facilitators as the leaders of the conversation. We will speak directly to the facilitators.
- We will remain seated.
- We will use a talking object so that all may be heard.
- We will use “I” statements and speak only from our own experiences.
- We will keep the conversation confidential, meaning whatever is said is not to be shared with anyone who has not participated in the conversation.
- We will not make any electronic recordings of the conversation.
- We will limit note-taking to brief reminders of topics to address when it is our turn to speak.