Coronavirus Response

  • Home
  • A-Z List
  • About
    • About the NCC
    • Connectional Table
    • Staff
  • Calendar
    • Events
    • Google Calendar
    • Past Events
  • Churches
  • Contact
    • Find Us
  • Districts
    • District Office
    • Beacon
    • Capital
    • Corridor
    • Fairway
    • Gateway
    • Harbor
    • Heritage
    • Sound
  • Employment
  • Search

NC Conference

Healthy Congregations and Effective Leaders in Every Place Making Disciples of Jesus Christ for the Transformation of the World

  • Discipleship
    Developing Disciples
    • Christian Formation
      • Children
      • Church & Society
      • College
      • Differently Abled Persons
      • Educational Ministries
      • Older Adults
      • Status & Role of Women
      • Young Adults
      • Youth
    • Church Revitalization
      • Coaching
      • Disciple Making Way
      • Evangelism
      • Grants
      • MissionInsite
      • Real Discipleship Survey
      • Shift
      • Spiritual Life
    • From the Bishop
      • Bishop’s Bookshelf
      • Bishop’s Sermons
      • Church Transformation
      • Conflict Transformation
      • Connections
      • Discipleship & Learning Plan
    • Multicultural
      • Asian
      • Hispanic/Latino
      • Native American
      • Strengthening the Black Church
    • Stewardship
      • Apportionments
      • District Remittances
      • Financial Discipleship
      • Grants
      • Insurance
      • Mission & Service
      • Pension
      • Treasurer Training
  • Leadership
    Strengthening Leaders
    • Bishop’s Office
      • Appointment Book
      • Bishop’s Sermons
      • Church Transformation
      • Conflict Transformation
      • Connections
      • Discipleship & Learning Plan
    • Ministerial Relations
      • Board of Ordained Ministry
      • Called to Ministry?
      • Extension Ministries
    • Board of Laity
      • Certified Lay Minister
      • Lay Servant Ministries
      • Local Church Lay Leaders
      • United Methodist Men
      • United Methodist Women
      • United Methodist Youth
    • New Faith Comm.
      • Called to Plant?
      • New Room Society
      • Our Communities
    • Conference Offices
      • Center for Leadership Excellence
      • Christian Formation
      • Communications
      • Conference Secretary
      • Connectional Ministries
      • Information Technology
      • Multicultural Ministries
      • Outreach Ministry
      • Treasurer’s Office
  • Service
    Ministering To The World
    • Local Outreach
      • Church Construction
      • Church Loans
      • Restorative Justice and Mercy
      • Disciple Bible Outreach
      • NCC UMVIM
      • Seed Funds
      • Mission Projects
        • Health Ministry
    • Global Outreach
      • Imagine No Malaria
      • Love for Liberia
      • Missionaries
      • Project AGAPE
      • Sierra Leone: Mission of Hope
      • ZOE
    • Disaster Ministries
      • Donate to Storm Response
      • Hurricane Florence
      • MERCI
      • Response Plan
      • Response Team
      • UMCOR Kits
    • Giving
      • Advance/Rainbow Covenant
      • Apportionments
      • Give to Storm Response
      • Mission & Service
      • The Gary Wayne Locklear Mission Endowment
      • New Room Society
      • Special Sundays
    • Ministry Partners
      • Camps & Retreats
      • Partners In Ministry
      • Robeson Co. Church & CC
      • UMF
  • Resources
    Supporting Ministry
    • Conferences
      • Annual Conference 2019
      • Annual Conference 2020
      • Charge Conference 2020
      • General Conference
      • Pilgrimage
      • SEJ Conference 2016
    • Media Center
      • Catalog
      • Labyrinth
      • Ministry Tools
      • Online Resources
      • Weekly Newsletter
    • Online Resources
      • Archives & History
      • Church Lookup
      • Online Data Collection
      • Online Learning
      • Pastor Lookup
      • Podcasts (NCCUMC.FM)
      • Ramus: Web Hosting
      • Video (Vimeo)
    • Publications
      • Advent 2020
      • Appointment Book
      • Bible Study
      • Conference Directory
      • Conference Journal
      • Every Day Grace
      • Lenten Reflections
      • Mission & Service
    • From UMC.org
      • Agencies
      • Communications
      • Discipleship
      • Finance & Administration
      • Global Ministries
      • Graphics Library
      • Relief
      • Status & Role of Women
  • Conflict Transformation
  • About CTM
  • CT Ministers’ Resources
  • Blog Roll
  • CT Minister Application

Looping

September 16, 2019 Leave a Comment

My last blog post was about reflective listening. This blog post describes a practice called “looping,” which is a part of reflective listening. Looping can be a very effective way to assure people that they have been heard. Looping lessens anxiety and is a helpful conflict transformation practice.

When you “loop,” you repeat back what the speaker has said. You ask if you got the content right. If you got the content right, then you ask, “Is there more?” If you did not get the content right, you give the speaker the opportunity to clarify or correct. You repeat that content and ask again, “Did I get it right?” You keep going until the speaker says you have gotten it right.

Looping can be very challenging at first because you have to listen intently to what the speaker is saying. You can ask the speaker to pause so that you can reflect back a smaller chunk of content. As you get better at looping, you will probably find that you can reflect back larger chunks of content. You can also take notes so that you have an outline of what was said. Those notes are confidential and you shred them after use.

A short example of looping:
Speaker: I am really hopeful for the UNC football program this year. I was surprised and delighted to hear that we had hired Mack Brown. He was one of our most successful coaches in the past. He had a good run at Texas and then he was fired. In Chapel Hill, there seems to be excitement in the air. Season tickets sold out in July. Maybe the Tarheels will have a winning season.
Me: You sound like a football fan. Is there more you are excited about?
Speaker: I just hope that we beat Duke. Duke is having a really good run with Coach Cutcliffe.
Me: You are wanting an important conference win for the Tarheels, too.
Speaker: That’s right. The Carolina football program needs some wins to boost morale.
Me: Winning helps, doesn’t it? Do you have more hopes for the Carolina football team?
Speaker: Well, we lost at Wake Forest, but, Wake has a good team, so I am not too worried.

My example above may seem a little silly and looping is not necessary in all situations. In highly conflicted situations, looping effectively lessens intense emotions. When we can reduce anxiety, we can reduce conflict to a more tolerable level (on and off the playing field!).

  • Twitter
  • Facebook
  • LinkedIn

Filed Under: Uncategorized

About Molly Shivers

I am a child of God, a follower of Jesus Christ, and a minister of the Gospel. I have been in the professional ministry since 1999 and am an Elder in Full Connection in the NC Conference of the United Methodist Church. It is my great privilege currently to serve as Director of Conflict Transformation Ministries for the NC Conference.

Recent Posts

  • What I Read in 2020
  • Up to 11
  • Finding Balance
  • The More Things Change
  • 528 years

Psalm 133:1 NRSV

How pleasant it is when kindred live together in unity!
Conflict Transformation Ministries Logo

NC Conference of The United Methodist Church · 700 Waterfield Ridge Place · Garner, NC 27529
Phone: 919.779.6115 · Toll-free: 800.849.4433 · Fax: 919.773.2308

Copyright © 2021 · Privacy Policy · Powered by WordPress · Site Admin

  • e
  • k